Once Upon a time

Once upon a time there was a princess in a tower. No, that’s not how it starts. Once upon a time, the princess kissed the frog in the glass slipper and the three bears fell asleep for one hundred years. Or wait, maybe the bears got stuck in the tower and the princess lived in a house that stood on a chicken leg. Or did the princess make three wishes on a magic goose which meant jewels fell out of her mouth whenever she spoke?  Which was OK in some ways, except that it made it difficult during her ascent of the crystal mountain, since she started panting and the sliding gems made a terrible racket rattling down the mountainside.